chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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