I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Randomize
