I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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