I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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