I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize