Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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