hell yes lets make some ravioli
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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