We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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