I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
