does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
