dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize