I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
wat bout pragnant strippers??
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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