Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Randomize
