I love black thongs
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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