I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
