Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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