Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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