We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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