dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
the raccoons are back...
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