And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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