quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
