It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
