The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
