The beer is more important than you right now.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
