Sry I called you an 8
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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