Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
