normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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