She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
There's a naked man in my car right now.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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