I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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