Who did Billy Mays play for?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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