Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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