dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
