quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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