JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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