brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
