absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
