I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
