Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
