Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
