Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
