I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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