Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
