So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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