Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
