Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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