I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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