i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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