Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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