So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
