i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
