K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
