You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
